For You

There’re no words to say
No words to convey
This feeling inside

I have for you
Deep in my heart
Save from the guards
Of intellect and reason
Leaving me at a loss
For words to express my feelings

Deep in my heart
Look at me losing control
Thinking I had a hold
But with feelings this strong
I’m no longer the master
Of my emotions

- Tracy Chapman, Debut Album (1988)

We just had a great feast of fish and good conversation for luncheon till a phone rang. Your counter has been suspended pending announcement. Look what is the other counter being suspended. We were suspecting a corporate M&A in the offing.

He left a company to join another company and the procedures of transfer is ongoing, strangely for too long a time. This industry emulates the professional football transfer practise. By a bizarre twist of coincidence and faith, his new company could be acquired by his previous company.

I have to dedicate to him this song because the first two verses accurately described his predicament. By thus far, he has not lost control.

I'd say buddy, face difficulty or such bizarre coincidence as scout and ossies. A scout is supposed to smile under all difficulty. And, ossie put a sense of humour into just about everything, even laugh their trouble away. Don't worry you and family will be alright.

We can never understand, even if try to rationalise and justify why certain things happen and certain things don't. I have stopped figuring it out and resolve to just move on. Off course, it is never easy on us and yet at times I do get into instances of regrets and dissappointment. After so often, I try to numb myself.

... I am no longer the master of my emotions.

A Voice
January 18th, 2006, 8:30 a.m.
Kuala Lumpur